Late-Night Hosts Take Aim at Donald Trump Reinstating Fitness Test

Yesterday Donald Trump signed an executive order to reinstate the Presidential Fitness Test in public schools nationwide, much to the delight of late-night hosts. During his announcement, he ranted to a group of children about the stock market, his poll numbers, how he should have won the Nobel Peace Prize for ending eight wars, and the war he just started with Iran.

On The Tonight Show, Jimmy Fallon quipped, “Trump is very into fitness. In fact, whenever somebody asks about the Epstein files he sprints out of the room.” He added, “Trump said the fittest kids will get to come to the White House and help build the ballroom.”

Fallon shared a clip of Trump announcing the news in the Oval Office alongside a group of children, Robert F. Kennedy Jr, and Education Secretary Linda McMahon. During the event, Trump bored the children by talking about being elected as president and ending wars. “The kids are like, ‘This could have been an email,’” Fallon joked.

On Jimmy Kimmel Live, Jimmy Kimmel noted that Trump’s version of the fitness test involves seeing “how many Wendy’s tendies you can fit in your mouth.” Kimmel added, “Only Donald Trump would bring back a test he would have no chance of passing.”

Kimmel shared several clips from the announcement, including telling the kids he had ended eight wars and transgender athletes. Trump claimed there has been “transgender mutalization of your children for everyone” during his speech. “This man is insane,” Kimmel responded. “He made up a word, mutalization, and he’s telling children about it!”

On The Daily Show, Desi Lydic pointed out that Trump’s subject matter, including nuclear weapons and the war in Iran, might not have been totally appropriate for the kids. “How are you talking about nuclear war in front of children?” she asked. She added, mimicking Trump, “‘You kids have seen Oppenheimer, right? Florence Pugh. Her titties were out for 10 minutes and he became death, destroyer of all worlds. So true. So true.’”

On Late Night, Seth Meyers noted that Trump claimed during the event that Iran would have launched a nuclear strike against the U.S. and Israel if he hadn’t taken action against them.

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“You just know those kids were thinking, ‘Yeah, but didn’t President Obama reach a deal with Iran during his administration that reduced uranium enrichment by 98 percent, as well as allow for international inspectors to ensure that Iran was hewing to the deal in exchange for sanctions relief?’” he quipped. “I mean, they were polite not to say it. But they were thinking it.”